Some of you hit the middle of the school year last month, but the effects do linger. Here’s how you can tell:
- All the pens you bought in bulk last fall are missing, and the pencils are jammed in the vacuum cleaner along with a dozen twisty ties.
- Saxophone practice isn’t nearly as painful to endure as it was a few months ago.
- Your recycling bin is filled with math homework, the top half of permission slips and excess kiddie artwork (carefully hidden under empty cereal boxes and a circular for a supermarket nowhere near your house.)
- Your purse smells like a box of Scratch and Sniff Chocolate Valentine’s Day cards.
- You can sense the school bus is about to arrive three-to-five minutes beforehand, like birds before an earthquake.
- The smell of Staples no longer gives you a school supply high.
- You have a huge pile of socks and none of them match.
- You are available to explain the scientific method, conjugate the French verbs “faire” and “avoire” and tell the story of the Boston Massacre in a manner that could only be improved if you wore a period costume.
- You’re making spaghetti for dinner tonight. Again.
- You’re beginning to look forward to summer break.