10 Things to Teach Your Daughters

 by Jen Singer

1.  Never get your eyebrows waxed by a woman who draws hers on.
2. “Cute” shoes can be like St. Bernard puppies: adorable at first, but rather cumbersome later.
3. Never ask a man what’s he’s thinking, because chances are, it has to do with bacon double burgers or “MythBusters” – and not you.
4. Try to picture what that tattoo would look like on Grandma before you get one that will last the rest of your life.
5. The women you read about in history books – the true role models – wore underpants in public.
6. Stoves, dishwashers, vacuums and other such appliances are gender neutral.
7. Diamonds are a girl’s best friend, but a cat is nicer to curl up with at night.
8. The stomach flu is not a diet plan – but it sure is a great head start.
9. Men can’t read your mind but your mother can. And the answer is — not until you’re 21.
10. If someone says, “You throw like a girl,” reply, “Thank you!”