Apollo Ohno in our kitchen after the 2006 Winter Olympics. We didn't reuse those paper plates.
I’ve gone back a few years to find these classic “Back Fence” stories, crazy things that happen to Mom and Dad:
Free Puppies
Thanks to Kelly Beauchemin of Putnam, Connecticut, for this story:
Luke, 4, has been asking for a puppy. While Kelly love puppies and dogs, she’s explained to him that they just don’t have the time to spend with a puppy right now, and they’re expensive.
One day, in the car, he said, “Mommy, I have a great idea. I’ll take some of the money that I’ve been saving and buy YOU a puppy. What kind of puppy would you like?”
Smooth, Luke.
Orders
Thanks to Laura Lundy of Nelson, British Columbia, Canada, for this story:
One morning at Tim Horton’s, Canada’s version of Dunkin’ Donuts, the sales clerk asked for Laura’s order. James, 5, offered up, “My dad would like a beer!”
Food Review
Thanks to Kim Kreis of Fairfax Station, Virginia, for this story:
Kim and her family were visiting friends. Her friend had made a nice dinner of vegetarian burritios. They all sat down for dinner when her son, Greyson, 4, started picking at his food.
Then he blurted out, “Mom, this is horrible food.”
Mortified, Kim yanked him up from the table, left the room and gave him the polite behavior lecture.
Then she told him he had to go back in, eat his dinner and apologize to Miss Sandy.
He sat back down at the table and said, “Miss Sandy, I am sorry the dinner is so horrible.”
And from Jen Singer’s personal stash:
Open Windows
The following is a conversation between my friend and her neighbor:
Friend: (Sheepish) Did you hear me yelling at my kids last night?
Neighbor: (Horrified) No, why? Did you hear me?
Home, Sweet Home
Nicholas (age 4): “Why don’t you go to work and Daddy stays home?”
Me: “Because Daddy wouldn’t last a day at home.”
Daddy: “Try an hour and a half.”
100 Things
I was helping out at my son’s school one afternoon with another class mom. We were quietly cleaning things in the sink, while the teacher led the class in a discussion.
Teacher: “Okay, class. Can you tell me something in your house that there are 100 of?”
Me (under my breath): “One hundred dust bunnies.”
Other mom: “One hundred dog hairs.”
Share, share, that’s fair: What’s your funny it-happened-to-me story?
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