Now that I’ve got a teen in the house, I thought it would be fun to go back to the early days of MommaSaid and remember what my boys were like when they wore light-up sneakers. Here are some MommaSaid Classics from “Potties in Heaven” (because my son asked me if there were any:
The Short Form
Nicholas (age 5): “Mommy, do taxes hurt?”
Mom (age 30-something; I’ve lost track): “Yes, Nicholas. Yes they do.”
Achoo!
One day, I sneezed while driving my mini-van, but no one in the back seat said a word. So I said, “What do you say when someone sneezes?” And Chris, age 3, answered, “It’s too loud!”
Cleaning Service
One of Nicholas’ five year-old friends was in my car for the first time. As I strapped him into his car seat, he looked at the car floor and said, “You know, you could clean this up.”
I was about to say, “You know, I could take you home.” But he was busy offering me his grandfather’s Shop-Vac®. Apparently, it would take an industrial strength vacuum to clean up that mess.
Parting Gifts
Chris (age 4): “Mommy, where’d you go?”
Me: “The dentist.”
Chris: “Did you get a surprise?”
Me: “Yeah. The bill.”
Non-Sequitors
Chris (age 4): “Mom, I’m hungry. I wanna make some puppets!”
Ups and Downs of Parenthood
One weekend, we trekked into New York City to visit the American Museum of Natural History. After spending $6 to cross the George Washington Bridge, $32 for parking, $23 for lunch and $38 for admission to see one of te world’s greatest collections of dinosaur fossils, I asked Chris, then 3, what his favorite part of the museum was.
He answered, “The elevator.”
Next time we’re going to the mall.
Computer Class
Our cat was sitting on my lap while I checked my e-mail.
Nicholas (age 3): “Mommy? Are you teaching him the computer?”
Erin Go Build
Chris’ friend Auston, 4, was over for a play date last week.
Me: “Auston, what’d you do in school today?”
Auston: “Sheetrocks.”
Me: “Sheetrock?”
Auston: “Yeah.”
Me: “Did you put an addition on the pre-school?”
Auston: (nods)
Me: “Auston, do you mean you made shamrocks?”
Auston (perturbed): “They’re SHEETrocks!”
Share, share, that’s fair: What funny things have your kids (or their friends) said? Tell us:
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When my daughter was 2 1/2, she said, “Mommy, thunder doesn’t make noise when it drinks wine.”
When my daughter was 3, I said “I love you more than anything in the whole wide world!” and she asked me “Even chocolate?”
When she was 4, I said “I love you more than anyone else in the whole wide world!” and she put her hands on her hips and responded “Does Poppi know this?”
When she was 5 I told her “I love you soooooo muchhhhhhh!” and she asked “Would you still love me that much if was boring?”
Not much chance of that happening, m’dear.