I’ve asked for a cure for cancer so often, perhaps it’s time to lower my expecations a bit. So last night, while I laid awake thinking about life and whether or not I remembered to buy milk at the supermarket, I came up with five simpler things I’d ask God for:
- Middle-aged insomnia should coincide with parenting babies. That way, you’re already up, so you might as well change a diaper.
- People should be able to order dreams from Netflix. (Sorry, no Horror is available.)
- Cars should lose their old car smell, just like they lose their new car smell, preferably before I take my friends to the Springsteen concert next week.
- Sock dispensers.
- Signs from God that are actual signs (i.e. “STOP eating the Mint Milanos when you think no one’s looking.)